5 Questions for Martha-Lee Ellis on Caregiving and Flexible Jobs

5 Questions for Martha-Lee Ellis on Caregiving and Flexible Jobs5 Questions for Martha-Lee Ellis on Caregiving and Flexible JobsWelcome back to our 5 Questions series where we get to know someone who is important to flexible jobs through five questions. One reason people search out flexible jobs is because they are caring for a loved one or friend who is ill. For many in the Baby Boom generation, this includes elderly parents, but for others like Martha-Lee Ellis, this means caring for a spouse with an incurable disease.Keep reading to learn more about caregiving and flexible jobsIn her new book, The Other Side of Alzheimers What Happens to You When Your Spouse has Alzheimers, Martha details the 10 years she spent caring for her husband through his Alzheimers and what she learned through this very isolating experience.Marthas career has been centered around working for the disabled. She is the former president of the North Carolina Association of Directors of Disability Centers and r emains active in support groups for caregivers, on college advisory boards, and with foundations related to adults and children in need of caregiving.We asked Martha five questions about her experience as a caregiver and the advice shed give for others who care for, or who are considering caring for, a loved one with an incurable disease.1. What were some unexpected moments you encountered when working and caring for your husband?After he was placed in an adult daycare center so that I could continue working, getting him ready to leave in the mornings on time was sometimes unsuccessful. Because of his Alzheimers, while getting dressed he would become distracted about something he couldnt find (sometimes being convinced that most of his socks or his loose change had been stolen), and he would insist on looking for whatever was missing. Delays in getting him to daycare and me to work were leid uncommonAfter he was in the nursing home, I was called in the evenings on three occasions th at he had been hospitalized for seizures or sudden onset of pneumonia, which required my having to miss my next day at work.Having to discontinue evening speaking engagements and meetings was difficult but sometimes could be changed to lunch-time settings.2. Was your employer flexible or how did you manage your workload and caring for your husband?My Board of Directors worked with me 100%. I had been Executive Director of our agency for twenty years and they knew I had spent countless hours over the years conducting agency business outside the daily operating hours. They were concerned for my husband and for me, and their understanding made it easier to concentrate on my responsibilities than it could have been otherwise.3. What advice would you give to someone just beginning as a caregiver?Learn about the symptoms and possible progression of the disease to help prepare you for changes in caregiving responsibilities. Caregiving evolves from simple supervision to constant involvement . Join a support group to hear others experiences, challenges, successes and feelings.Try to discuss the illness and healthcare wishes with your loved one, including end-of-life decisions.Discuss your circumstances with your superiors and obtain an understanding of their ability and/or willingness to be flexible about your job. To the best of your ability, stay on task while at work so that you are not letting details go unfinished and accumulate.4. What is your advice for people who must work and care for a loved one?Find a reliable caregiving resource that you trust, such as adult daycare or in-home care so that you can focus on your job during working hours. If you choose in-home care, make sure that you have a back-up caregiver in case your primary one gets ill, has family problems, orbecomes so exhausted that he/she falls asleep while caring for your loved one. Make unscheduled checks often or have a trusted neighbor or family member do so.5. With so much responsibility, were y ou able to find time to care for yourself? What advice can you give our readers?Caring for myself was very difficult and not always possible if I had to pay someone to care for my husband while I was away, even for the day. My son would travel from a long distance to stay while I went away for a weekend, but that couldnt happen often. And I never allowed myself to be more than two hours from home if I traveled at all, in case of an emergency.Whenever possible, let family and friends share in the responsibility to give you respite. Even when a friend takes your loved one for a pleasure ride or safe activity, you have time to do something for yourself (perhaps take a nap?) Dont reject asking for help. Some church or civic groups will set up a schedule for helpers to come and relieve you, even for a couple hours if not overnight.Checking with local resources, such as Resources for Seniors or your local Alzheimers Association can often provide leads to caregiving assistance.If youre car ing for a loved one with an illness and need a flexible job that allows you to be both a caregiver and a professional, we have over 50 jobs categories from all industries and with flexible work opportunities ranging from telecommuting to flexible schedules to part-time work.